Karma? Not sure which way it's going though...

To be perfectly honest, I think after my past 18 months I deserve a normal relationship. You know, where jobs and honesty are involved with both parties. I've had plenty of time to decide where guilt should be placed from these past catastrophes and it's not with me. That being said, let's look at what's happened in the few days:

Thursday night I watched The Office and posted a quote as my status on Facebook. Next thing I know I get a comment from a guy I was in 4-H with when I was like 12 (I'm 23, do the math). We haven't talked since then, and I'm pretty sure I was way too awkward to say anything to him when I did know him because he was 4 years older than me, 5 in school-age, making him way cooler, and way more mature. Anyways, I comment back already insecure he's remembered even one outfit my mom squeezed me into back then. Oh yeah, um, there's also this photo posted on Facebook for his viewing pleasure... YIKES. Yeah, this would have been taken when he was in my life. (I should be insecure.) Okay, so whatever, I write him back all excited, because I mean 6th grade crushes die hard, okay? Well, he ends up getting my SN on AIM and we chat on there, and then we decide to meet up the day after Christmas. (He lives like 8 hours away... Figures.) Okay, this is only Saturday now. HUGE progression in 2 days. My hopes are way up.

Sunday comes around, and I get a phone call. A PHONE CALL FROM MY 6TH GRADE CRUSH!!! Whatever you haters, I'm a girl. It happens. Okay, so I maintain, I think, and I think I'm a great success on the phone. :D

I text him a lot on Monday because I'm home and home doesn't have technological advances to allow for internet access. And then my friend (the text proposer, yeah, I know, I deserve what happens now) comes over to talk to my brother about college. While he's there, P is texting me about his company party in D.C.. I'm feeling great, until my sister decides to start her 17 year old shit stirring. What would pop out of her mouth but: "Megan, you have a text! It's from a boy." Now she turns to The Amazing Texter: "Megan had so many guys over here in high school. She's dated, like, everyone. It was crazy." Back to me: "Oh, and what happened to that guy you met at the bar you were just talking to?" HOLY HELL. Oh yeah, she did that. I could kill her. Not that Texter means anything to me, I'll even fully admit I never should have had him over, regardless of my brother's educational state. But wow. I'm now blown away. I say nothing and just give her the "you just wait til he leaves" stare because tearing your sister's limbs off in front of company is just rude. *.*. replies, "She did NOT date everyone, because she never gave me a chance." At this point, I feel my reputation still has a little bit of decency left to it... Whatever, P calls again that night and life is good again.

Tuesday: Mom gets home from work and sister, Mom and I are sitting in the kitchen when I mention B's little antics last night. Mom's horrified and mock's B's comment: "Hey *.*. - my sister's a slut!" Thanks, Mom. You're really helping. After my look of anguish, Mom allows me full reign of hurtful comments to B's next 'love'. (I'll wait til she's about 23, when she stops making these ridiculous mistakes she calls boyfriends, much like her sister.) I'll probably mention something about the emo stage she's currently in and probably bring a picture of this Elvira hair cut she's rocking. ;) I text *.*. and let him know that she's in trouble, and I'm sorry for that display of white-trash culture. Who cares, it's probably Karma's way of getting him out of my life ASAP, although I could have thought of less hurtful ways... Now here comes the sticky part: P is staying in town an extra 3 days to hang out. Um, that means a serious performance for 3 days, and making sure I don't have word vomit happen, which is likely the case. Also, I don't know what the hell I was thinking, but I invited him over to my house. WHAT THE HELL IS MY PROBLEM?!?!?! MY SISTER JUST CALLED ME A SLUT IN FRONT OF THE LAST GUY!!!! Please refer to my header of this freakin blog... Yeah, it looks freakin great right now, stuff movies are even made of (leaving out the sister bit), but I bet it's just so I get my hopes up about as high as they can go, just so I invite him over like a moron, my sister says some horrigying comment about something I didn't even do or know about, I blunder and he beats it out of there like a bat out of hell - appropriate label here.

Today: called my mom to tell her P's coming over next week and we're having a family meeting a day before to go over some ground rules. Some thoughts so far:

1. No stories. Especially not ones that involve my so-called incompetencies. Crazy in new relationships needs dished out over years, not days.
2. No bodily functions in front of P. My brother thinks he's Larry The Cable Guy half the time, this is unacceptible on so many levels...
3. No sister. What a friggin bitch. She doesn't get to come out of her room around my company until she's 25.
4. Stepdad MUST appear as if he adores me. We don't get along in front of company 90% of the time and he always makes fun of me and makes me look like I need a helmet. This is probably not attractive to normal guys, so I think I'll give him a script.
5. No stories, no stories, no stories... Ughh. Last boyfriend got about 3 hours worth in one day.

I'll get back to you on the 29th to let you know if I still stake ownership to my family or if I've killed myself dramatically displaying my discontent. :)